Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Hegpetz's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Friday, July 6th, 2007
1:13 am	My new journal/blog My new journal/blog http://hegpetz.blogspot.com/ (Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 20th, 2007
3:37 am	Choosing Men's and Women's Fragrances Beautiful fragrances know no gender. Contrary to what Madison Avenue would have you believe, there's almost no such thing as Men's or Women's fragrances. Did you know that Old Spice™ was originally sold as a woman's cologne? Eau de Cologne has been enjoyed by both sexes since it's release in 1709. In India and the Middle-East, where the art of perfumery was born, people simply wear what they think smells good. In our Western culture, we let multi-million-dollar ad campaigns tell us what smells good. And that stinks! Typical western (European-style) perfumes have a combination of scents called top-notes, middle-notes and base-notes. Top-notes are light florals or citrus scents. They give a first impression of a perfume, then fade soon after. Middle-notes are the heart of the perfume. Base-notes are the long-lasting anchors, or fixatives, used for holding the lighter scents and making them last longer. Many men's fragrances simply lack top-notes and flowery middle-notes, making them smell flat and boring. Some of the better men's fragrances are actually women's fragrances, rebottled and relabeled with masculine names! Famous perfume houses have been known to take their so-called women's scents, pour them into different bottles, give them new names, and sell them as men's colognes. They sell the exact same fragrance under two different labels, to two different markets. Most of the Madini Perfumes are designed to be worn by everybody. The fragrances that they suggest for men are far superior to most men's fragrances today. And they're just that: suggestions. If you wear what you love and it works with your body chemistry, no one will know if it had a pink or blue label, so to speak. They'll just think you smell good. If in doubt, order samples, then do what people in the perfumer's trade do: Wear what you like, wear what makes you happy! And if what you love is a natural perfume without synthetic chemicals, all the better! Happily copied from http://www.tigerflag.com/mens-fragrance.html . Current Mood: bored (Comment on this)
Friday, May 25th, 2007
1:23 pm	Bored. So. My athlete's foot and just general open wound on foot is finally almost healed itself away, and my pink eye I guess decided to spare me, and the lump in my throat is disappearing, and my rashes from working on the farm are finally kind of leaving, but now I'm getting a sinus infection, which kind of is worse than any of those were. On top of that, stress levels are even higher. Is it too much to ask for a friend? Rawr. I overreact a lot :/ Note to self: Stop that. (Comment on this)
12:48 am	excerpt After all these these lessons learned I've found the only way to live is to remember the times you smiled cause I'm still waiting for that rock to go around my neck I joked about it then but I swear I woulda worn it never taken it off even if it meant the death of me but now I'm running to the clock trying to go back in time I'm praying for a remedy but God's not picking up the phone After all these these lessons learned I've found the only way to live is to remember the times you smiled Current Music: Brand New - Limousine (Comment on this)
Monday, March 26th, 2007
8:20 am	Victorious Morning After (new song) Rapidshare link Current Mood: bouncy (Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 28th, 2007
5:04 pm	black Don't fall but fear everything and hold yourself strong for the nights will be long and the wind will bite hard Don't let the cold sting of loneliness drown you but hold yourself strong for the nights will be long and when you bite, bite hard Whispers come at me in the middle of the night Am I wrong to be alive? The plaster on the wall The wood in the frame This blade still feels the same and there is black I'll flash you Flick you Your buttons are mine for I have none of my own because I show them so open they are stuck on and I'm just a shard shapeless form disconnected like this station that is non operational I'll be you just you wait They scream at me at night We are wrong to want to die The blood on the wall The skin stretched frame This soul will never be the same and there is black Current Music: Can - Tago Mago (Comment on this)
Friday, February 23rd, 2007
3:23 am	Wow!!! That party was great!! I'm slowly letting myself be - I never would have expected dancing freely to come first, even though it is still awkward around other people - oh well. I almost didn't go to the party but I am really glad I did. Totally Michael really was totally awesome! Anywho the dancing and singing and partying was fun!!! Yeah that's right I finally sang in front of people, even though it wasn't really a good selection as I only knew the chorus to almost every song but like one lol :) Current Mood: cheerful (Comment on this)
Monday, February 19th, 2007
3:46 pm	I just need an ear Post look side to side See it's all alright In the dim lit depths of catacombs You are all alone This unholy book once mistook could unravel this very world Designed for looks just do not touch else you yourself will melt But I was born with intent and raised in the teachings I knew lament and have suffered the screechings so with brass resolve I leaned in and gripped it with my hand said the mantra bowed my head and thought I could understand but as I took the book right off the shelf it looked at me unfurled it yelled with wolf-like fierceness and pierced my very self In stupor I fell back a step feeling inner pains, An evil gasp my heart collapsed and it's fingers clasped my soul. I braced a wall in shock, a sinister world ingrained, In a substance clap it lost its grasp and I rose above the rabbit hole. so will this evil go unchecked? They're watching us with midnight's grace slithering silent words and they've a penchant for the sheep of lost lost in pursuit of good held back only by the few of us who in light understood but woe to we defenders who fail and know they should so join the forces delete the introspect I lay in shock for days and count the ways I've lived and died and breathe I feel myself to check persistence and to ensure it's really me Didn't you hear? Evil now abounds Didn't you hear? They take the form of human bloodhounds Didn't you hear? The lost are growing worse Didn't you hear? This world was designed to be a curse Oh my God How did it get this way? What good can come from a day such as today? But in the past There's surely been much worse Oh my Lord How come we can't agree? On who we are Just a unique pedigree Here they come They're coming after me! Oh oh no Oh oh no so will this evil go unchecked? They're watching me with midnight's grace slithering silent words and they've a penchant for the sheep of lost lost in pursuit of good held back only by the few of us who in light understood but woe to we defenders who fail and know they should so join the forces delete the introspect Current Mood: cheerful (Comment on this)
Thursday, February 8th, 2007
1:23 am	If there are infinite dimensions splitting off every moment, then here is one of my deaths happening elsewhere. Or this is an excerpt from a book that I will never finish, 101 Ways I Could or Should Die. This one is a call for attention. I post on this livejournal a message about the duck pond, and I text Joseph to tell him I have a new entry. Or I might just text a few clues to people that will never be figured out. Anyway. I either swallow some nice pills, or I don't, it doesn't matter. I then drive to the duck pond and go for a long swim. I'd prefer having my guitar around me, my phone in my pocket, with my wallet and keys, standard style for me. I would be wearing my little pink heart necklace and I would be halfway on my back in the water. I can feel the cold chill as I slowly die, and all would be right with the world. I would have my mp3 player playing also, until it died in the water with me. I originally thought of just driving my car into it, but there's not enough guarantee that anything would happen to me, and I love my car. I want to leave it for someone else to have, that's also why I don't really want the guitar with me. I wish there was a way to cut without scars other than what I already do, and I'm determined to find one Current Mood: exanimate (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, February 5th, 2007
3:11 am	Adderall Hmm..not sure what to think of you yet Adderall, but you weren't too bad. Not too bad at all. Current Mood: calm Current Music: The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony (Comment on this)
Sunday, February 4th, 2007
2:10 pm	Superbowl Just a few years ago I was playing Quake 2 Freeze tag, Rockets 'N' Rails, right now, and all through the super bowl. A few years later, I was playing Quake 2 Vortex at the same time. Then Teiravon. I miss all of that. what am I doing now? hrmph. Current Mood: nostalgic Current Music: DJ Kim - Jetlag (Comment on this)
Friday, February 2nd, 2007
5:11 pm	The Judges Speak Silence Celebrated rituals hinge on the waiving of rights when you enter catatonia you will finally see the light but be warned of the leeches that joy to suck your skin for as good as they may feel they will burn you to your end All hands collapse with the rhythmic claps All voices chant with your heads bowed back All on your knees as nature dances round celebrate our difference and know we're not off-track Reinforcement of this ideal Allows it to appeal Though logically it repels and only feels like Hell But rejection results in punishment and no one wants to lose. It's a self replicating entrapment that cycles through endless fueds Current Mood: amused (Comment on this)
3:23 pm	Wow!!!! As usual, NOTHING came in the mail for me today! Hooray!!! God it's so depressing..lol...been waiting for fucking freaking forever. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 31st, 2007
11:48 pm	Welcome to my world I'm such a fucking liar. This allows you all insight into a little bit of how my life is every couple of hours. Completely flip flops, but whatever. Thanks to Justin I'm back to normal I guess, but really I've been normal all day - guess it's life, or God, or myself teaching myself that I'm a fucking idiot who had his priorities in the wrong place. Oh well who cares, back to living life, laters (Comment on this)
11:29 am	it's over now. No more depression, no more ecstasy. It's all over with. She's dead and I couldn't care less. Actually getting to have one of those secrets that is so great but you can't tell anyone isn't what it was cracked up to be, because it's like being the only doctor in town. It's great until you get sick, then you realize that there's no one around to help you. So fuck it. She's dead. She provided many people with a great illusion that only enhanced their lives, whilst it tore mine in two - it's just not worth it. The phrase "i love you" is so fucking over used at the same time, it's just not used enough. I'm just me now. She's not part of me, no one and nothing is, I'm not going to assimilate anything or anyone, it's all just simply dead and gone. Leaving just me, the soot at the bottom of the orange juice, the pulp. If I lose friends, so be it. Getting to visit heaven for an hour the price of a night in hell just isn't worth it, I'd rather just live at baseline like everyone else. Justin, I noticed you mentioned that you wanted to find the meds that would make you feel normal and just be able to enjoy life - well maybe you don't need meds, maybe we can just let go of the shit and move on with life. I really don't care anymore, I'm done with it all - no need for anything anymore, just going to drone on and try to do alright while I'm here - I've never felt the need for doing my best, so I don't see why I should put forth that extra effort, so um, yeah, if this works then this will probably be my last journal post. not like anyone reads it anyway, such a pointless concept. Current Music: Blank & Jones (2 Comments |Comment on this)
9:10 am	everything is ok solid. Put on a smiley face! :) Current Mood: awake (Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 30th, 2007
11:20 pm	life I hate it. The bullshit just never fucking ends does it? This is where I tear through the wallpaper whilst screaming as loud as I can, followed by the hammer through the monitor, the tower, and the support beams holding this shitty ass wall up. Then I go to my car and start driving above 90 again on old forgotten roads just praying I can be forgotten and can forget as well. I'm such a drama queen. But seriously, when something good DOES happen, it's chased by even deeper shit and I hate it. So not in a good mindset to do the only thing I want to do, then again I can't even get it now. Maybe tomorrow everything will be better, just like it maybe would have been today. Or maybe I am just a god damn dumbass. Fuck all of this shit. Bring on the nightmares, because then there will be a point to these waking hours other than fucking me out of happiness even further I'm spent. Current Mood: need to stop waking up Current Music: Linkin Park and whatever else wants to play (Comment on this)
2:06 am	woooo! I love new things when getting high! I have now REALLY used a bong properly and have inhaled more smoke in a different way than ever before, I was coughing till it hurt and then after for quite a ways too - and it was well worth it!!! Anyway, I urge everyone to keep pushing their limits and to keep exploring in all directions - be very careful not to get caught up in one. We are amazing. ToMoRrOw Is TrIp TiMe!!! ^_^ for me and pb! Current Mood: content Current Music: the people downstairs' party thingy? (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, January 29th, 2007
8:22 pm	i should just give up now but she continues to burn, a small little candle in the dark, ever burning, but the wick grows short (1 Comment |Comment on this)
7:31 pm	new song http://www.jch321.com/mp3s/ look for As We Fall Rendered Compd but sadly upon listening to the exported version I can only live out this dream: i am like a dog trying to jump out of a large hole i jump high and dig my nails into the side, finally getting closer to the top than ever before and then i get a glimpse of a view from above, looking down into the hole and I realize just how deep I still am and I realize that there is no way I can get out. Current Mood: depressed (Comment on this)